Family Encyclopedia >> Family

Playing together, now what to share:about making friends and bullying your sister

For some children it comes all by itself:fair sharing. They give away the biggest piece of cake and effortlessly share their most beautiful toys. Is your child a little Robin Hood? Then you're lucky. Social behavior with kids, especially among themselves, usually does not come to mind. It's something you have to teach them, just like cycling and swimming, according to the authors of “Playing together, what's sharing?

Table of contents

Together we will share (almost) everything

It is a feast for the eyes:children playing together. There is a lot of babbling and giggling, including here in the house. But as cozy as it is, a childhood friendship is not always a bed of roses. In fact, what looks like a cozy playdate , can just turn into crying fits and tantrums. From one moment to the next, the flames can explode and the kids are at each other's throats. As your children get older, they can solve this together every now and then, but that's because they've already learned about it.

Conclusion:playing together and sharing together does not always happen automatically. In fact, usually children act very selfishly in this area in the beginning. The authors of “Playing together, what to share?” have made a manual for all moms and dads who have their hands in their hair from time to time.

Read also: learning to play with other toddlers

The book:Playing together, what to share?

Playing together, what to share? was written by Eva Bronsfeld and Elsbeth Teeling. The book is about social behavior in children – something that in most cases just needs to be taught. When a friend comes to play, for example, and the toys suddenly have to be shared. Or how about the arrival of a brother or sister?

Playing together, what to share? is about brother and sister love and childhood friendships. And how you as a parent can ensure that the playtime does not end in fighting. Of course that is a process, and with a 5-step plan you are not there yet. Fortunately, reading this book is absolutely not a punishment, and it does contain a lot of tips that can help you.

What do you find in the book 'Playing together, what to share'?

The book is full of tips and tools to guide your children. With this you ensure that the playtime that children have with each other is even more fun and you give your children a social basis that will benefit them for the rest of their lives.

What you can expect from Playing together, what to share? In any case, not a boring theoretical parenting book. The authors have fully understood that parenting is hard enough, and that books about parenting do not have to be too hard. A joke here and a wink there. Nevertheless, it is primarily an educational book for parents. Full of tips and fun exercises that you can do with your children. For example, exercises to learn to be patient – ​​a great boost for both your child and mom and dad.

Read also: sibling day, 6x why I'd rather have a sister

About making friends and bullying your sister

Also useful in playing together, how to share:a lesson 'how do you learn to argue'. Because arguing is part of it! Also instructive if you and hubby don't always agree with each other. Or how about:how do you learn to say sorry? Perhaps even more important than learning to argue! And something that will benefit your mini-me for the rest of his or her life.

And bullying that little sister… cut it off. Yesterday we had such a day here. Late to bed on New Year's Eve, short fuses on New Year's Day and a brother who is 5 years older than his sister. Ingredients for an education soup that should not be eaten too hot, because then the bomb will explode completely.

You probably recognize something in it. Siblings who bully each other and where you have already tried in different ways to ensure that they don't get in each other's hair. Not entirely unimportant of course, because how nice is it when brother and sister get along well? Not only now, but also in the future. Because what they share together, they do not share with others. They are brother and sister!

Strengthening the brother-sister bond

The book 'Playing together, now what to share' gives a number of great tips to strengthen the bond between brother and sister (or brother-brother or sister-sister of course). One of the best tips, for example, is the 'what-was-the-most-fun-with round'. For example, take a moment every week with the family to name what was the most fun thing you did with each family member.

It may seem a bit forced, but in the end you can turn it into a beautiful ritual which is not only very nice to name together, but which ultimately also gives you a grateful feeling.

Read also: quarreling children, with 4 tips from rascal to angel

The book is hilarious from time to time

The toddler logic described by Eva and Elsbeth is also hilarious:

9x toddler logic about possession

  1. If I like something it's mine
  2. If I have the vest it's mine
  3. If I can take it from you, it's mine
  4. If I held it a while ago, it's mine
  5. If it's mine, it's never yours
  6. If I play somewhere, or build something, then all the pieces are mine
  7. If I see something first, it's mine
  8. If you play with something and you put it away, it's mine afterwards
  9. If it's broken, it's yours!

Why as a parent you should have this book

All in all, 'Playing together, what to share' is a nice parenting book to read. It is of course not the case that everything you read in this book can be applied one to one to every child. In addition, there are various things that you really knew yourself, but that does not matter. It's about that mirror. You have to hold up that mirror to yourself every now and then. Because before you know it, you'll fall back into a parenting mode in which you feel sorry for yourself because your children are fighting each other again. While you can certainly help them at moments like this 😉 .

It's a book I keep close to me. 'Playing together, now what to share' will be added to the list of books 'to be consulted regularly'. And it should be there with you too!

Data Book 'Playing together, what to share'

  • Author:Eva Bronsveld and Elsbeth Teeling
  • ISBN:9789021564036
  • Price:€ 17.50
  • You buy the book online here

Elsbeth previously wrote the book Relax Mama, which we also wrote about. Eva wrote the book Temperamental children and together with two other writers (Roos Schlikker and Milou van Beek) they wrote 'From behind the wallpaper to over your ears' about relaxed parenting. Each and every one of these books worth reading!