Not on the computer or to soccer practice if you haven't finished your homework. Or extra computer time or pocket money when the homework is done. Does punishment and reward help with motivation? Or does it not help at all?
In the short term, punishing and rewarding probably works, but in the long run there is a high probability that it will backfire. This applies not only to homework, but also to other elements in education, of course.
I'll tell you a little more about motivation. There are 2 forms of motivation:
Good. When you punish or reward your child, you are therefore on the extrinsic motivation. In the beginning this will work. But it often has a short-term effect. After a while, those rewards aren't that interesting anymore. And as parents, you probably don't want your child doing homework just to avoid punishment. In the long term, punishment and reward have nothing to do with the motivation to do homework.
My youngest son is still in the potty training phase. And to be honest, it doesn't work very well. We've been busy with reward stickers a number of times. This was interesting for a while, but not for long. As a result, he just pees his pants again. A clear case of extrinsic motivation with a short-term effect…
Soon the time will come when he is tired of diapers himself or when he thinks he is big enough to walk without a diaper. Then it comes from intrinsic motivation. And then the potty training must have happened in no time. I hope 😉 .
By the time you read this, the potty training phase will probably be over. But it actually comes down to the same thing as doing homework. Extrinsic motivation helps for a while, but ultimately it is necessary to be intrinsically motivated. To really want to and to see the usefulness of something.
Set goals. For intrinsic motivation, it works very well to set goals. Every child has a goal that he or she wants to achieve. And just like the goals you set for yourself, you can also help your child make his or her goals SMART. Specifically. Measurable. Acceptable. Realistic. Time-bound.
To set goals you can use a goal form, which I have drawn up for you myself and can be requested here. On the basis of the goals you can make agreements about doing homework. Agreements that your child supports, because he or she can achieve his or her goal.
But what do you do if your child does not keep to the agreements?
You discuss the consequences of not keeping an appointment (problems at school, unsatisfactory marks, etc.). And also agrees on the consequences. You will see that your child often has ideas about this.
There are 2 options:
It just depends on what suits your upbringing and child.
